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Tuesday, August 22, 2006

Ok what's with all the morbid bloggers today? Everybody is talking about death. That's a hard subject for me, two years ago I was in and out of hospitals almost every month, the final time was for a a month. I was in a coma for most of it, so I don't really remember too much. Just that I tried to say goodbye in the ER room to my family but I couldn't, there was a breathing tube down my throat. I tried pointing to my eye for "I", then to my heart for "love" ", then to them for "you". All my family came down to Ft. Lauderdale where I was living because they were told I wasn't going to make it. My friends, family and co-workers would come and read to me, not knowing if I could hear them, one of my best friends would sing in my ear a silly little song from "Anger Mgmt".
That's all I can write on this today, or maybe for a long time. It makes me sad.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

If it's not too personal can I ask what happend? I've noticed reading your blog you visit Dr.'s a fair bit.

RR

Helene said...

wow... so did you hear them read to you? Any outta body experience? Did it make you rethink your life? I ask these questions because I recently had 4 deaths in my family... my mom, father in law, brother and I lost a pregnancy... Everyone thought it would make me appreciate what I had... be thankful to be alive and it sort of did the opposit... it made me desperate for all that I dont have. I want to experience everything now because I could freakin die tomorrow! Its a really tough place to be as a mother of 3 and wife of 18 years! lol but it is what it is! I cant change what fate has orchastrated.

TTQ said...

Ramblin Rose- It's hard to explain what happened, but it could have been avoided or maybe it was just something I had to go through to get to the otherside.

Katie-Q- Thanks, me too, glad I have blogs like yours to read!

Kate- It was a very weird time, I didn't know real from unreal. I went on alot of adventures and met alot of people while I was sleeping! Nobody knew what the hell I was talking about! What I do know is that I finally accepted that I am here for some reason and that it isn't my time to go. My life totally changed for the better, and in ways I would have never planned on my own... I gave up trying to steer my own ship, I wasn't doing a very good job!

Helene said...

TY for the reply... I get you with trying to let your life unfold on its own. I run ragged trying to be sure I am on the right path and really... who the hell is the judge of the right or wrong path... it would seem that where you are is the 'right' path for that moment! Hope that making you think a lot wasnt a bad thing today. That wasnt my intent.

=]