I Like Things In A Box And Tied With A Big F'ing Bow

I have this thing about presents, I love to give them and I like wrapping them. I like when things fit nicely in a box and you can tie it up with a big fucking bow. Life should be like that. It's okay to open them, just open them slowly so you don't break or tear what's inside. I can't seem to give just one gift, I like to give multiple things, I've been shopping for this shower since I heard the date was finally set. It's a Fall Wedding and the invites were in a metallic brown envelope..Loved it! So I wrapped my presents up in fall decor. Martha, you better watch out.

If I've done anything I'm sorry for, I'm willing to be forgiven.”

So today I'm thinking I was a little harsh on my thoughts about the Wedding Shower. After all, they are trying to please everybody which is why it's a mishmash of everything. The groom doesn't get his Vegas Wedding so they are making a separate party for him. The Bride's sisters did fly in last night from Chicago and North Carolina to host the party and my SIL is opening her house up for the party. The wedding invite came yesterday and they are beautiful and the location is pretty swanky and they even sent an invite to my mom which was very sweet.

So basically, I was just bitching because I don't feel so hot. I began getting vaccines on Wed and I have to go back next week because they didn't want to tax my system by giving me four different ones on the same day so they only did two one in each arm and next week they will do two more maybe three if I can talk them into it, then I go back in two months and six months for the second and third parts of the ones I got this week. On top of all the other Dr's appts. One of the big things I miss about living in a big city is the quality of health care. I have to drive the hour into Orlando and the hour back even if my appt only lasts 15 mins or so.

Enough bitching, I have one more present to wrap and then I have to see if I can make guacamole from some really hard avocados.

SIL has requested that Honey does his famous lap dances tonight, that's always a treat. Now that I know how to work the video on my camera, I might just catch a dance.


“I'm sorry you are wiser, I'm sorry you are taller; I liked you better foolish and I liked you better smaller.”

----Aline Murray Kilmer

Another WTF?

My niece is having her wedding shower tomorrow night. Perfectly normal right? Wrong. One- it's a SURPRISE. Normal enough. But wait! It's unisex, okay that scraps a couple of presents I was going to give her. So once I got it straight that it was uni-sex, I read the invite again. It's a Casino theme! Yay! Honey and I don't gamble. But they all do. But wait! There's more! I reread it again, It's a Casino-Luau! hmmm. WTF is that , we pretend we are in Hawaii at a pig roast playing poker with visors on? Or do we pretend that we are in Las Vegas having a luau?

So it's a Surprise, uni-sex, Casino, Luau Wedding Shower! Ta-da! At this point we should just roll Halloween in there and maybe Thanksgiving and be done with everything till Christmas.

Oh and you have to wear casual bright tropical attire, sandals only. Wait I just read it again.

Adults Luau Casino night...Dress Festive/Vacation Style "Flip-flops only" and that is what is printed on the invite. Shit, I really wanted to dress up as Sharon Stone in Casino. Honey could wear his blazer and have his cigar ala Tony Soprano.

Mental Health Day

I'm declaring a time-out for myself. I'll be back when I have deemed myself qualified to play amongst the rest of the bloggers of the world again. Right now, I'm going to sit here and whine to myself how shitty my day has been. Cause really, it's all about me isn't it. And if it's not then leave me alone anyways. No? Really? Go away! Come back!

Actually I had a pretty good post going on until Blogger didn't save my post. And now it's gone. And I'm sad. I'm mad.

Another Reason Not to Wear Crocs

Crocs and other soft-soled shoes can get stuck in the teeth of escalators and cause minor to severe injuries. Sandals, tennis shoes, flip flops and other "shoe entrapments" have been yanked to the bowels of those moving stairs. A few horrifying accounts describe Crocs and immitation Crocs on the feet of children becoming stuck as the escalator stairs converge and causing toes to be ripped off or mutilated to the point of needing amputation...

Whoops

Elton John tickets went on sale yesterday morning. I forgot. Elton is Honey's favorite, me not so much. I like him but I don't think I would ever buy his cds. Not that I need too, Honey has most if not all of them.

Last month Tori Amos tickets went on sale and I didn't buy them, I just saw her two years ago. Honey had Mom buy the tickets on her credit card leaving no paper trail for me. So, I got surprised with tickets.

Basically, Honey got screwed. The show is sold out. In my defense he was suppose to call me and wake me up so I coould be online when they went on sale.

I still feel bad though, Honey doesn't ask for much.

Why My Mom is Cool #65428

Evangeline1: Did you get my text message?

Evangeline1 is idle at 6:19:24 PM.

Evangeline1 is no longer idle at 6:21:08 PM.

Evangeline1 is idle at 7:17:12 PM.

TTQ: no i've been resting today

Auto response from Evangeline1: I am away from my computer right now.

Evangeline1 is no longer idle at 7:24:26 PM.

Evangeline1: I was trying to learn how to text..

TTQ: it's hard to punch all those little buttons

TTQ: you did very well

TTQ: I got it

Evangeline1: Good. Noqw I need to learn how to leave out vowels and use numbers and make it totally unreadable. My BFK

TTQ: My bff

TTQ: There's a book we can read

Evangeline1: I need to.

TTQ: get the lingo down?

Evangeline1: What's BFF?

TTQ: my best female friend or best friend forever

Evangeline1: cool. That is so much fun .

TTQ: lol

Then we go on about stuff you guys could care less about.l

LadymanTTQ: ur silly

MissEvangeline1: Yeh right. But age allows me.

LadymanTTQ: yep

LadymanTTQ: :-)

Starting Over

My world just got rocked. My general practitioner's office lost their best Nurse Practitioner (i.e. mine). I didn't see her alot because I mostly see specialists. But the transplant center ordered some vaccinations (I wonder if I get tags with that) and said just go to your GP's office, so I kept putting it off for the last month. Today I call for an appt. and they tell me she left in June. She is going to be a SAHM, which I knew but didn't think it would be this soon. Everybody else I know goes to the same one here in town and not in Orlando, so I figured I could switch to one here, but they all see the same one and he isn't taking new patients. So I'm gonna go meet this other N.P. at the same office I was going too, and I'm going to have to start all over again....sigh, I can barely keep all my tests and appts straight as it is, now I have to explain it all again? Even Honey gets confused. God, she was great. Also she was a Ex-pro ball player's wife too, so we always had a great time when I went to see her. Did I mention she was efficent, caring, and smart? I'm sad.

The Theme Appears To Be Art

Factory Girl finally came from Netflix after waiting a long time for it to be released, I watched this weekend. It's a film about Edie Sedgwick and her relationship with Andy Warhol.
The clip isn't from the film but gives a brief look into her life

The book I read on the cruise was about art too. Lulu meets God and Doubts Him

From Publishers Weekly

In this enjoyably tart art world sendup, winsome, aperçu-spouting Mia McMurray (think Party Girl–era Parker Posey) is a gallerista—one of the invariably decorative young women who act as a gallery's de facto concierge, and "who is always, always watching," as Mia herself puts it. A mysterious portrait by the recently late Jeffrey Finelli (killed by an errant cab in front of Mia's Simon Pryce gallery) gives the novel its winningly clumsy title and sets up its main conflict, between grasping art collectors and representatives of Finelli's estate. Former Mademoiselle and Woman's Day editor Ganek, herself a significant art collector, offers sharply drawn characters and convincingly savvy details. That the book's most important female collector is presented as a loudmouthed and overdressed refugee from Absolutely Fabulous gives a sense of its waspish humor. But Ganek stops short of crude caricature, and Ganek's portraits of the variously sneaky, ridiculous and pretentious art world denizens are tinged with affection and depth. The tone is sophisticated chick lit, and there's a sweet love story threaded in, but what most clearly animates this debut, and sets it apart, is a real sense that art matters. (June)

Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.

My Moon My Man

I want to wear a trench coat next time I go to the airport. I want to do a line dance of sorts on the moving sidewalk. Alone with My Moon My Man, My Moon And My Man. All alone in my head singing and dancing like nobody will see me. I want to be her just for a song

No chicken?

Honey told me he would rather incur my wrath by calling me a bitch everyday than have me do the one thing that annoys him more than anything. Me annoy? He couldn't even say it, it annoys him that much.

So what else to do but rattle off a list of my offensive behavior?

Um pick my nose? No. I would rather you pick and I eat your boogers.

Forget to fill the dog's water dish? No.

Run my nails down the back of your neck while you are on the phone? No.

Come to bed late at night? No.

Driving over the grass to park in our driveway or pulling out of our driveway? ( I love doing that, I giggle everytime I do it.)

Move the furniture around? No.

Change the bedroom look every three months? No.

Honey then stops me with "I'm doing my paperwork, we'll get back to this" (meaning he hopes I will have forgotten.)

Fine.

What is it? Tell me. Please? Have you ever told me it annoys you? Yes?

Hmm, I don't recall you EVER saying anything.

Oh I have, trust me I have.

What is it?

Ok (sigh) The Chiken thin....

Oh! Chickety China The Chinese Chicken!

Stop!

No! It's funny it makes me laugh (I guess I know it really is annoying). It just makes me giggle I can't stop saying it!

Oh..To Be 25 Again & All Lacquered Up

Did I Really Just Write This?

Sunset from our balcony. Honey took a few pictures of me naked on our balcony, which I may or may not post. I didn't even know he had taken them until we got back. We have named one Honey Butt, because, really all you can make out is my ass and hair. If I post it , I might add a poll to see how many people think I have a big ass. Honey says "No it's not". I say "It is". So bloggers you may be called upon to settle the score.

Wading Through

Last week I was wading through pretty waves, this week I'm wading through bills, appts, phone calls, and housecleaning. I'm sad, I really liked being on the ship because the stateroom attendant would make our bed up every time we messed it up. At home, it's a losing battle.

Yippe Ka Ya Yay!

My new power source came today! I showed great restraint and did some work around the house then whipped out the toolbox and pulled out the old power source, and installed the new one. 5 minutes flat. Sweet Sweet Surfin! I felt like I had lost a best friend, sure I had the laptop or Honey's computer to use, plus a spare antique one that actually works. But bliss is my favorite chair and my desk with my desktop Pc with all my pics, bookmarks, and finely tuned puter. You can wear my panties, parade around in my bra, sleep in my nightie.. BUT do not touch my PC. Just don't, I mean it. Seriously. And while on the subject, don't touch my Gummy Bears.

Gone again

One vacation is over and I'm getting reday to leave for a mini vacation today. Be back in a day or so..

huh?

I came back from vacation and my template was gone. Strange, so now I have to start all over again instead of just jumping right into blogging. This makes me sad. The back doesn't even work anymore.

Great Night Of Work

I haven't held this amount of cash in a long time, last night proved to be a productive one with the Ta-Ta's and tassels. Spending money for the cruise!

Hand me my Leather

Look I'm standing naked before you
Don't you want more then my sex
I can scream as loud as your last one
But I can't claim innocence

Oh God
Could it be the weather
Oh God
Why am I here
If love Isn't forever
And it's not the weather
Hand me my leather

I could just pretend that you love me
The night would lose all sense of fear
But why do I need you to love me
When you can't Hold what I hold dear

Tori Amos- Leather

I feel pretty...

Today started off rough....

Move your ass Dipshit!

Burn in Hell!

But now:

I feel pretty
Oh so pretty
I feel pretty and witty and gay
And I pity
Any girl who isn't me today
I feel charming
Oh so charming
It's alarming how charming I feel
And so pretty....

After a day getting a manicure, pedicure, leg massage and 4 inches of dead hair cut off..yes please, blow it staight, I don't care how long it will take our how much... just do it....

Barking Ta-Ta's

Dogs barking. Dogs barking. Honey egging it on since we never really hear Fletch bark to often, which is good it's not a bark it's a bray and Honey finds it funny(Where the Fuck is my Xanax?!). Zeus, on the other hand is our doorbell. We get to hear him every day. Apparently he has "town" rules of his own, like he owns all property in front of our house including the sidewalk and the people across the streets house. So yeah, we hear him a lot. But both dogs barking at once..I'm going to shove my earphones in my ears and start counting minutes till our vacation. Three more days, three more days. This is worse than Christmas. Please be Sunday when I wake up, then we can grab our bags and get on the ship. I know I shouldn't be throwing away my days at this age. But is it so wrong to be so impatient while waiting on vacation?

On a side note: Next month is Breast Cancer Awareness Month, I was at the post office today and a car in the lot that said "Save the Ta-Tas!" Naturally I looked down at my own Ta-Ta's and said "Ta-Da! Don't worry my pretty little melon shaped friends, we are up to date on our testing". Are you? Because you guys already know I like to say Ta-Da! and saying it with Ta-Ta's! Enunciation bliss! Ta-Da! Your Ta-Ta's have been squished and flattened enough, you are good to go! So please get your Ta-Ta's checked and come back to me and just put Ta-Da! in the comment section doesn't matter which post, I'll know what it means.

I thought of a slogan for prostate cancer but I'll blog on that some other day.

The Bumble Blog Fall TV Buzz

I am as addicted to Tv as I am the Internet, in fact I'm debating on adding a third DVR here at home and ordering Showtime so I can watch Californication. Here's my Fall schedule I'll be adding it to my DVR's this month. The fall season starts the day Honey and I come back from vacation. I'll be leaving for a mini vacation that week with my mom, but we like the same shows so it's all good.


Monday

Samantha Who? (ABC 9:30pm)



CSI: Miami (CBS 10:00)

Tuesday's

Law & Order SVU (NBC 10:00 pm)

Wednesday

Pushing Daisies (ABC 8:00 pm)



Private Practice (ABC 9:00 pm)



Gossip Girl (CW 9:00 pm)
I'll give this one a watch but I doubt it will make it to my DVR on a regular basis



CSI: New York (CBS 10:00pm)

Dirty Sexy Money (ABC 10:00pm)
I'll give this one a watch but I doubt it will make it to my DVR on a regular basis




Thursday's

Grey's Anatomy (ABC 9:00pm)

CSI (CBS 9:00)

Without a Trace (CBS 10:00pm)

Friday

Women's Murder Club (ABC 9:00pm)




Saturday

None

Sunday
Desperate Housewives (ABC 9:00 pm)

Cold Case(CBS 9:00)

Hurricane Felix

A second Cat 5 Hurricane is out and about in the very waters were I'll be cruising next week. I really don't care exactly where the boat goes, I'll just be glad to be on vacation with Honey. So it's no big deal to me if we get rerouted. I should be out buying crap for the trip or at least making a list, instead I'm sitting here in my pj's drinking coffee.

Honey wore me down into taking the laptop and getting internet access in the stateroom. So that means I should be blogging and maybe sharing pics. Or I might just leave you for a week. I'm looking forward to sitting on our private balcony and reading. Input rather than output..

Bigfoot lives in my house

"Holy Crap! What was that?!"

LMAO!


Don't tell anyone, but Bigfoot lives here. Honey as I call him, wears a size 14 1/2 shoe (ladies-control yourselves). It took me 6 months to find sandals that he both liked and that fit. Today's mission, flippers for our vacation. Not having alot of luck, the only ones in that size were some kind of mutant short floating flippers. Even searching online was tedious. Oh and the guy in the dive shop said Honey really needs to come in even for the mask..because if he has feet like that he probably has a huge melon. And he does, hats sit on the tip of his head, which is okay cause I really don't want him runninng around like Panama Jack. Baseball caps do fit and that should be it for him in the hat department, He doesn't need a hat large enough to shade both of our beach chairs.

He loves me, He loves me not

I took my turtle out for handling last night to see if I can get him to love me, I wanted to let him crawl around but all I could see was the cat (babyfred) playing hockey with the little two inch shell with a baby turtle in it. Whap! Score! Hey! Where's turtle? Has anybody seen turtle? Crunch! Uh Oh! Zeus, put the turtle down! Zeus! You broke turtles home! Bad Doberman!

Edumacted Driver

School is back in session full force which means to me? School zones and whizzing through them for about 10 feet before I say "Oh Shit!" and take my foot off the gas peddle. The thing that gets me? The school zone is a higher speed limit than my subdivision. You would think it would be lower. Wouldn't you? Does this mean the kids at play are more important than the kids coming home from school? Who makes these things up? Maybe it's because they have crossing guards out in force to assist the children coming home from school, maybe they were writing too many tickets or the traffic was clogging up the major roads.

Awhile back I blogged about a toll booth that was stuck on the green thank you, I put my money in it anyway just to be safe, yesterday on the way to Orlando at the same tollbooth I put my mony in and nothing happened, it stayed on the red stop. I sat there and waited then went through and felt guilty for not waiting. But what if it never did change and it took a picture of my tags and I get a ticket (which may or may not happen either way). I am going to be sooo pissed. And probably too lazy to fight it.

V-A-N-I-L-L-A

Not even French Vanilla. We were describing people by how they dress and their personalities. Honey said I'm vanilla. To me that means boring. To him that means good. Kind of like apple pie and American flags. I asked my mom how she would describe me and she said eclectic. Eclectic. I suppose I can live with that. Why does it even matter? As my side bar says, "I'm an original- Don't label me."
How would you describe your self? And if you know how how other people describe you, do you agree?

The Test Market

You may or may not have notice that I have placed a few ads on my blog, curious to see if it will actually make me any money. I've been skeptical when reading other blogs that report that they actually earn money, so here is my attempt. I actually don't have a big readership (I know crazy, huh?). So here is my plea: Click an ad or two when you are done reading, I promise to report back to the readers when and if I earn any money. I need the capitol to a) manufacture my bobble heads b) to buy an army of Roombas and start a maid service and c) paint for painting turtles to look like Roomba's (I'll sell those at the local craft fair). I'm pretty sure a bank would give me a loan for any of those business ventures, but I'd rather not start a small business in which the bank has a stake in. So think about it all the ideas have room for growth, I could make Bobble heads for Bloggers world wide! I could also buy a fleet of Scoobas to wash the floor after the army of Roombas have attacked each room at the same time. The painting turtles to look like Roombas & Scooba's could be expanded to paint Roombas look like turtles. Not in love with that idea? Then I could paint your Roomba or your Turtle yellow with a big smiley face. I could be the Cafe Press of Roombas & Turtles..Molly Maid will be banging on my door for custom paint jobs. Oh the possibilities!

Bumble Blog Bobble Head

I have a big head, I look like a Bobble Head. That's sexy huh? Let me know if you want to buy one, I have a feeling they might sell out. Everybody in my family is going to get one, they just don't know it yet. They can pop me on their dash and watch me agree with everything they say. No smart ass comments to endure. No Temper Tantrums ..well you get the point.

For Kim- She's The Best

I'm a Freakin Genius!

As you can see turtles and cats get along. However, I had a great idea! Kitty isn't scared of Rommba either, so I am going to paint my turtle to look like my Roomba. Roomba lonely no more. God, I'm brilliant!

We had a baby! It's a turtle!

Honey found this little bitty turtle while he was in the garden (our backyard is on a canal). We feed the turtles all of our old bread, we just go out and toss it into the canal and they eat it right up. Somehow this little guy made it up the bank through some tall grass and into our yard. He was just walking along our patio when Honey spotted him and brought him into me while I was making a salad. And of course, I wanted to keep him. Honey went out to the garage and got another fish tank that we aren't using and we made him a home. Doesn't he look happy?

What should I name my turtle?

Today's Excitement & Procrastination

I was cleaning house again, fuck if I keep this up...it's gonna get ugly. See if I keep it up, Honey is going to expect it all the time. And that would be bad, I could just clean rooms that he never goes in, see that way, he won't notice anything. I already moved the furniture around today. Again. For no particular reason, I just felt like it. I also took down a mirror that was hung way too low and Honey hasn't drilled new holes for of it yet. I'm scared to drill into the brick wall...him he just goes for it.

My mother told me yesterday that she had rattled off a list of things that her brother needs to do next time he is down. He said he is looking forward to it! He comes down from Chicago to visit at least twice a year, once with his wife at the Holidays then another visit by himself to take care of mom's latest projects. I wonder if I can get him over here... I'll have two chandeliers to be hung as well as a ceiling medallion..and pretty much every ceiling fan in the house to be replaced. I buy all this stuff knowing full well that Honey can't play with electricity. So it's all in boxes on one of my couches, which works well for keeping the dogs off the couch.

I think I'm noticing a trend here, Honey is the procrastinator. He blames it on the lead paint chips he ate as a child and living under electricity wires.

Roomba is that You !?

Today is Monday and on Monday's I usually spend the day worrying about what I ate over the weekend and being perturbed by the three pound swing. Today my weight was good, which is good because I was good. So my attention is turned to other things, like grocery shopping and chores. I'm still trying to get this "homemaker" thing worked out. Shouldn't I of all people have a spotless house? I don't work, I don't have kids, it should be easy! Given the size of the house versus the number of rooms we actually use, it should be even easier. But alas, I live with a messy man, oblivious to chaos and three very furry animals who shed. We have dust bunnies, lizard skeletons, and pet hair clumps that roll like tumbleweeds. Today as I was sweeping (eek!) the weekend's hair balls into a corner to be swept into the dustpan, I had to sweep around the Roomba. Roomba was covered in hair. Almost in hiding, poor Roomba has been ignored by me as I combat the hair with: A) the broom daily B) The regular vacuum and C) The industrial sized Shop-Vac. I really need an army of Roomba's to be effective. I could set them all up at once and let them run till the batteries go dead. Granted, I would still have to do this daily. Until then welcome to my fuzzy wuzzy world, feel free to take a pet tumbleweed home with you on your way out.

Desperate Times Call For Desperate Measures

Boss Is Calling - video powered by Metacafe

Who Knew?

What Classic Pin-Up Are You?

You're Marilyn Monroe!
Take this quiz!

Oopsie!

Hurricane Dean is headed to all the Islands we are suppose to visit on our cruise in 3 weeks. Now we are wondering where we are REALLY going to be headed if there is a lot of destruction. It could be worse though, our Niece (who by the way has the same first and middle name as my sister) flew into Cancun/Cozumel yesterday and is trying frantically to get a flight out today.

Gone Fishin'

I got nothin..nothin but a huge migraine. crikey. atmospheric pressure.

Two nuns were shopping in a food store and happened to be passing the
beer and liquor section.One asks the other if she would like a beer. The other nun answered that would be good, but that she would be queasy about purchasing it. The first nun said that she would handle it and picked up a six pack and took it to the cashier. The cashier had a surprised look and the first nun said,"The beer is used for washing our hair." The cashier, without blinking an eye, reached under the counter and put a package of pretzels in the bag with the beer, saying. . ."Here, don't forget the curlers."

Trying Twitter

Twitter Updates

follow me on Twitter

Women in Film

Too Too Cute Tutu Kitty!

Because I'm bored. Isn't my Baby Fred darling?

Mary Magdalene and the Ponchus Pilot

Mom: Are you on drugs?
Me: No and that seems to be the problem.
Mom: DID YOU QUIT TAKE YOUR MEDICINE????
Me: I was bored
Mom: WHY??
Me: Things should be getting pretty exciting in a week or so.
Mom: I worry about you
Me: Don't we all sister? Don't we all...
Mom: Are you feeling ok?
Me: So-so
Silence
Me: Ta-da!
Mom: What?
Me: Here I am!
Mom: In all you glory
Me: I was just kidding about not taking my meds, just rattling your cage.

If my mom were Catholic this might be her (not about me going on a cruise but about stopping my meds), but my mom doesn't curse.

From The Rock To The Water

In less than one month, this will be me swimming with the stingrays in Grand Caymen. You can feed them, pet them and rub their bellys. Apparently they are like puppies. Can you believe the color of the water of the ocean? I wouldn't believe it except that this is not my first trip there and it was great! Last time though we didn't swim with the Stingrays. It's weird everybody seems concerned about swimming with the Stingrays because of Steve Irwin, but I figure you only live once. After all Dobermans get a bad rap and my Dobie is sweeter than cotton candy. Plus I have a sneaking inkling that they are Skates not Stingrays..I'm off to google that..

Rinse Wash Repeat

Do you ever do things you know you really shouldn't do? You know that the results aren't going to be good, but you do it anyways? Seriously. I never learn, or maybe my mind is set on the "Fuck It/whatever" mode. In which I do whatever I please then I have to deal with the consequences. Tell me one mistake you make over and over and if the results ever vary?

Ta-Da!

Ta-Da! I was aimlessly surfing when Mom IM's me. Her first line? Ta-Da! Like she was a magician on stage or a cute little dancer of 8 who just pulled off her first recital You have to remember this isn't her first IM ever, she's a pretty old hand at it. We IM pretty much everynight even though we just live about 5 miles apart. Ta-Da! I giggle everytime I type it. I just left a comment on my sister's blog, where she forgot to mention that I'm her Baby sister. She just said sister. Harumph. I will not be carried into her Gen X era without a fight. No Ta-Da! You are now in your late 30's (which I'm not). I'm thinking next year I'm going stick on 34, or maybe knock it down a year. I have this theory that you can pretty much pull off any age you want if you alternate years with sticking then reducing. Hell, I was 21 for 5 years then I forgot to add a year on when it wasfinally my 21st birthday, I had to look it up.

Debra Messing Likes To Go Braless

Where is Karen when you need her?

Iphone Shuffle

Space Shuttle

Just taken in my backyard. Well not really we were standing in the vacant lot next door...our grass looks much better than what yousee at the end.

Make it Stop!

Haha-when I was searching to see exactly how hot hell is ( because it feels like we are in hell now) ...this came up:

Visiting Hell?
Your Official Travel Site. Travel Deals from 100+ Sites
www.hotels.kayak.com

I don't think you actually visit Hell, I always thought you had to stay forever.

The whole point is, I'm melting..

That's right 105.8 in my backyard. I'm going to go crack some eggs and put a few pieces of bacon on the patio stones.

Hotter than before

It's not good when the temperature in your backyard sounds like a radio station's call letters. 105.4

Sexy Engrish and Bling

Besides the great Engrish on this Japanese web site Strapya, the cell phone straps themsleves are pretty cute. For less than $20 US dollars you can buy the set.

To attracted him today,
Don't show off your bra and shorts as a show girl..
Real Underwear Miniature Cell Phone Straps
can support you taking his attention to you...
EROKAWA,
a Conpound Word booming from JAPAN to the World lately.
Erotic but still KAWAII, these two words are all girls and gals want but it's impossible to make both in your beaty normally. EROKAWA fashion and Erokawa Style are quite innovative and greedy but wise ways now Japanese girls and celebs are willingly take!

Oh and Fuck the iphone, I want the new Vertu Phone, as always the Vertu phones are made with real diamonds, gemstones and precious metals..

Mena, Mena , Mena.....

What has Mena Suvari done? Looking more like American Psycho than American Beauty. She has shorn her lovely gold locks and looks like she and Britney Spears should form a cult. Or join the army or go play Gi Jane.. Didn't she take note of Britney wearing WIGS???

Californication

I've never been a X-Files fan, but I like David Duchovny well enough to give this preview a try. It's twisted enough that I would watch it again. And we all know my attention span is sometimes short. He plays Hank Moody in the new series along with NATASCHA McELHONE , MADELEINE MARTIN, MADELINE ZIMA and EVAN HANDLER

Famed novelist & NYC transplant Hank relocates to LA after his acclaimed
book is optioned, but it later becomes a crappy romantic comedy, which sparks a
horrible case of writer's block. He's struggling to get his career back on track
with the help of his agent/best friend, raise his pre-teen daughter, all while
pining for his ex-girlfriend, who is now engaged to another man. It may sound
desperate, but he enjoys life and owns all his various vices - drink, drugs and
women - with a refreshing sense of honesty and unapologetic candor. He's holding
it together while falling apart, and he doesn't mind it one bit.

I watched the preview episode on Netflix, but you can also see it here: Official Site.

Showtime set to air :

Mon. Aug. 13
10:30 PM
#1.1
Mon. Aug. 13
11:35 PM
#1.1
more

Elevator Up!

Turns out a new episode comes every Thursday! Yay! One more thing about Thursdays to love! Yay!



I would never do this. I love my pets, but I don't take them in elevators.

Still Going Up!

Man in the Box Show- Ronald Jenke

Runawaybox.com

Going Up

I live for Thursdays. Most people live for Friday, but since I don't work there has to be a day that brings the giddiness of an upcoming weekend. So what happens on Thursdays? Publix puts out a new sale flyer for the upcoming week for one thing, they start their sales on Thursdays, I like that. One of my favorite columnists puts out a new piece, I like him and I like knowing he'll be there every Thursday and even if he's on vacation, they will run an old piece. Another web site posts all new crap on Thursdays. So Thursdays are basically pretty exciting for me, especially since I don't remember any of this stuff until about 5 pm on Thursdays. Then I get happy, happy that the things that matter to me are all new on Thursdays, it beats the hell out of the regular news.

And here's a nice little Thursday joke:

A businessman got on an elevator in a building. When he entered the elevator, there was a blond already inside and she greeted him by saying, "T-G-I-F" (letters only).

He smiled at her and replied, "S-H-I-T" (letters only).

She looked at him, puzzled, and said, "T-G-I-F" again.

He acknowledged her remark again by answering, "S-H-I-T."

The blond was trying to be friendly, so she smiled her biggest smile and said as sweetly as possibly "T-G-I-F" another time.

The man smiled back to her and once again replied with a quizzical expression, "S-H-I-T."

The blond finally decided to explain things, and this time she said, "T-G-I-F, Thank Goodness It's Friday, get it?"

The man answered, "Sorry, Honey, It's Thursday."

The Pink Flamingo Award

Over the weekend looking out at Tampa Bay and a small nature preserve, we saw some pink birds that we we choose to call Flamingos, granted we were 6 flights up and the outside of the window had a fine salt spray haze covering it. The birds were more than likely a variety of Spoonbills as Flamingos are not native to Florida. While I was thinking about this, I was reminded of an idea that friend and I came up with while tooling along the exclusive homes of the Las Olas Isles in Ft. Lauderdale. Money does not buy taste, some of these 5 million dollar homes had such things as plastic grapes on a wrought iron fence, cheap concrete statuary common among trailer parks and a myriad of other atrocities that offended our eyes. It was then that we decided that those yards might as well have a pink plastic flamingo in the front lawn, if there wasn't one already. We mulled the idea over and decided that placing said flamingo would just result in the plucking of the famous lawn ornaments and it being discarded. It was then I decided that we should make a template that could be spray painted in under a minute and just off the curb in front of the house, not quite noticeable but after a few were discovered surely we might make the newspaper (w/o being known). Who is painting Pink Flamingos on curbs and what do they mean? Genius. We never did get around to executing our brilliant idea of "public art", but I still get a chuckle and an urge to head to the paint department for some pink paint every now and again.

A Girl's Weekend

Mom and I took a brief mini vacation over to the west coast of Florida. Tampa is about 2 and half hours away and an easy drive. We ate the historic Columbia Resteraunt for lunch, hung out by the pool and went to Landry's for dinner. The rest of the evening was spent reading and watching tv in our comfy room at The Grand Hyatt Tampa Bay. Nothing too exciting just a weekend jaunt. We are both pretty proud of the fact that we didn't go shopping and buy stuff we really don't need. In fact I actually got to wear a pair of shoes I bought a month ago but still hadn't worn. Regular posts should resume shortly......

ROOM

Rinpa Eshidan- Room

CastNoiz-Davi: Artistic Direction, 2D ArtDaisuke Yamamoto: Artistic Direction, 2D ArtD.H.Rosen: 3D ArtAkari Sasai : 3D ArtXola: Set Building, 2D Art

Let your ears do the talkin'

How cute are these little earbud covers?

"Frisky" Emotibuds
Charms for iPod earphones. Flexible vinyl charms grip onto classic iPod earbuds as well as second-generation earbuds with included inserts. They also fit many third-party earphones.

Emotibles

Internet Hostility- Coming to a site near yours

Let's see in my daily wanderings I found out that there is a small feud over at Pretty* In the City. Here is a small excerpt from Karyn describing her response to some "Hate Mail"

UPDATE: Even though I said I wasn't going to waste my time replying to his
email, I did waste my time Googling him.The "sae" in his email made me think he
was a Sigma Alpha Epsilon fraternity guy, so I Googled his name and sae together
and found out that he was one at Rochester Institute of
Technology.His full name is Christopher Martin Jacques and he lives in West
Henrietta, New York. My sole purpose in posting this is to let any potential
employers (who may Google him) know what a nice person he is, you know, seeing
as though he wants my face to burn off and all.

That amused me for a good 20 mins.

I jumped on over to a news site that reports the quirks and found this:

After John Anderson called him a nerd, Russell Navares took a leave of absence from the Navy, drove from Virginia to Waco and then set fire to Anderson's trailer home. That showed him!

Man burns house over Chat Room Insult

I'll leave all this goodness for you all to digest, and it should take your minds off of Lindsay Lohan, Paris Hilton , Nicole Ritchie and Britney Spears for awhile.

Netflix loves me, they really do!!

This was a gem in my inbox this morning. Blockbuster are you giving away free movies over the pc?:

Dear TTQ,

Great news! We're lowering the price of your 3 DVDs out at-a-time plan to $16.99 a month plus applicable taxes. Now you can enjoy Netflix for less!

You don't need to do a thing - except pay less. Your membership will automatically move to the lower price and be reflected in your Membership Terms and Details. The lower price will take effect beginning with your statement on or after July 23, 2007.

Your $16.99 plan not only gives you 3 DVDs out at-a-time but you can also watch 17 hours of movies and TV episodes instantly on your PC each month - for no additional charge.

Enjoy!

*** I did not know I could watch free crap! Of course the Sopranos aren't on the play instantly list, but I'm sure I find 17 hours of something to view.
Your friends at Netflix

Beyonce Bounce!!

And another thing that happened..

Oopsie! Beyonce took a fall during her show last night in Orlando:

From the Florida Today:

July 25, 2007

Beyonce falls during Orlando concert
WKMG LOCAL 6 NEWS

ORLANDO, Fla. -- Home video shot at Tuesday night's Beyonce concert in
Orlando captured the music superstar stepping on her trench coat and then
tumbling head-first down 12 steps at the Amway Arena. The video of the fall
was
released despite Beyonce's request during the show that fans in the
crowd not
post the video on YouTube.An Orlando woman at the concert, who did
not want to
be identified, offered the video to WKMG-TV early today. She
said Beyonce fell
on her face."We saw that she was pumping her hair around
and really into with
her trench coat and high heels and as she proceeded to
come down the stairs, she
tripped on her coat and it seems like she fell on
her collarbone and face,
sliding down about 12 stairs," the woman
said.Another fan told entertainment
site mediatakeout.com that the singer
was bleeding after the fall.Video showed
Beyonce getting up after the fall
and continuing to dance.The singer's request
not to post the video of the
fall on YouTube came at the end of her show Tuesday
night.

Poor Beyonce, I'm going to see if her wishes were respected and the fall was
not put on Youtube.

Nothin ever happens here until..

We got a call from the Police Station telling us to stay in our homes..half the subdivision is outside and most of the roads are cut off from traffic. Our lazy cul-de-sac hasn't seen traffic like this in a long time..



Situation in Rockledge closes roadway

BY KAUSTUV BASU
FLORIDA TODAY ADVERTISEMENT




Rockledge police and other law enforcement agencies have responded to a Bowing Lane residence and were trying to establish contact with a woman who lived there.

Neighbors told police that she had been arguing with them and appeared to be disoriented. Police fear for her safety.

She might possibly be hallucinating, said Rockledge Public Information Officer Donna Seyferth, and there were reports that she had a gun.

Levitt Parkway in Rockledge is closed to traffic because of the situation.


****The above picture is the model for our home "The Eastwood"****

It's kinda Pre-Brady Bunch, on the large view I found on the web, I swear there is a tee-pee in the sketch, in the upper right hand corner about where the canal goes through our backyard.

Snarks and Spoofs a Summer Time Must

So I skipped a few days blogging and I must say that it was time well spent on reading this book:

Secrets of the Model Dorm by Amanda Kerlin and Phil O.

Snarky, back stabbing, funny and often just gross. Metamucil Martini anyone?


And watching: Kathy Griffin: Everybody Can Suck It
which made me giggle out loud next to a sleeping Honey. It was one of those shows you are sad when it is over because she was so damn funny. I'm going to Tivo the next airing.

Monday, July 23 @ 9/8c

Who says the bottom of the Hollywood barrel can't be outrageously wild and downright hilarious? In true "D-List" fashion, Kathy serves as her own series lead-in when Bravo debuts her fifth stand-up special in which she takes comedic aim at everyone from Lindsay Lohan to Ann Coulter.
View schedule

Dating In A New Era

Guy meets girl in the bar:

Guy says "Where's your place?"

Girl says "Why, you gonna come over for a visit? Don't you have your own place?"

Guy says: "Oh come on, don't be coy like that, I really want to get to know you"

Girls says: "You want my MySpace address or my Blog address"?

Guy says: "Both"

Girl says "You have to choose, it's the only way I'll give it to you"

Guy says "Then I want your Blog address"

Girl says "Good choice it's http://wwwgirlinbar.blogspot.com"

Guy says "I'll leave you a comment or two, I use the name "GuyinBar"

Girl says "Thanks for the drink"

New gadget needed

Okay, so I open up my in box this morning and I have this message from my favorite lurker (Hi!).

And aside from the joke .... http://www.sharperimage.com/us/en/catalog/product/sku__SI676FUN

Now I know you guys don't have the time for reading the joke that was attached, you probably have an inbox full of them as it is. But the link above is a problem solver for all my lost items. One problem though..how do I keep from misplacing the base? If anything isn't glued or nailed down, essentially it is going to end up in my hand and me wandering off aimlessley and putting it down when something shiny catches me eye. It's just the way I am programmed. This base has a magnetic mounting bracket, so technically I could stick it on the fridge. However, won't you need to carry it around the house as you look for the item which is now flashing and beeping?

And once you found the object you will have now replaced it with your finder. Of course you won't remember where that was, because if you had, the object in question wouldn't have been lost in the first place.

OH NO!!!!

Remember when I "lost" my ipod? Now I seem to have "lost" my camera. It's not on my desk, where it usually resides for random shots of well basically me , honey and the animals. It's not in my purse the second most likely place. I even carry spare batteries in a lipstick holder, I would show you how smart I am for figuring out how handy that turned out to be, but I've lost my camera, remember? Granted I haven't left my chair and I vaguely remember playing with it in the living room taking shots of old jewelry. Even if it is the living room, I am still going to rant about it, because I shouldn't have to go hunt it down. I swear I am getting early Alzheimer's..

When lightning Strikes

I just wrote a long sucky post, and then deleted it. It had to be the most boring whiny post that I have ever written. Even I couldn't stand reading it, and I wrote the damn thing. Long story short:

I saw lightning strike something today. It was pretty cool. It rained here hard all afternoon. I had to make the trip to Orlando for a Doctor's visit, 100 miles round trip. At 45 mph and 5 feet visibility.

That is all.

Life

"Life isn't like a bowl of cherries or peaches, it's more like a jar of Jalapenos--what you do today, might burn you tomorrow...

Self Portrait

TTQ in South Park.

Just a little more love

Inbox from Hell

E-mail titles have been getting to me lately, they all just seem so strange , or in the case just downright cruel

From: Hotwire Deals
To: TTQ
Subject: Central Florida Hot Fare Alert for TTQ


Duh Hotwire, I know it's hot and you are slashing your prices for deals here..why? Because even the natives can't stand this heat anymore. I'd pass out before going on Space Mountain because it's too hot, too sunny and people are cranky. Trust me, I'm not the only cranky one.

Too hot to think, too hot to blog

It's too hot to breathe, It's too hot to go outside. It's sucking the life out of us, Honey is hiding in the dark bedroom napping with the dogs. I'm watching the rain clouds roll in, as soon as it rains the heat will be washed away until tomorrow.

Tomorrow when I go to my car, it will be like opening a furnace. You can actually see the heat come out, the same with driving on the asphalt of the straight flat roads, it appears that there are pools of water on the road.The car steering wheel singes your hands when you first get into your car. The metal piece on the seat belt is too hot to touch and will actually cause to snap your hand away like you had touched a burner. Stopping to get a slurpee which melts in 5 mins is the high point of the day.

This is the perfect weather to spend all day in a cold, dark movie theater. I've never been one to pay for one movie and then sneak into another one right after, but I am tempted now. A stop at Target to load my purse up with the good gummy bears and maybe some Snow Caps because just the name Snow Caps sound good, like an Icee. Anything to get out of this heat, even the pool is not an option, the sun is brutal no clouds, I would burn in about 5 mins flat.

At least the a/c is working now, it hasn't clicked off in ages, it's struggling to keep the house a cool 77. But the new motor is up to the job.